


If Only I Could Rewind Time

by icedteaandblankets



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Adults, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Heartbreak, High School Crush, Levi gets hurt, M/M, Sorry guys, Unrequited Love, eren doesn't like Levi bck, high school friends - Freeform, i am trash, levi is heartbroken
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-29
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-09-20 13:44:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9494057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icedteaandblankets/pseuds/icedteaandblankets
Summary: “we’ve been best friends since high school, you’ve been in a relationship all of that time. you share with me that you’re going to propose but now I realize I’m fucking in love with you please feel the same” au





	

**Eren: _Hey Levi are you up? Can I come over? I need to talk about something with you._**

Reaching over to his phone across the marble kitchen counter, Levi peered at the text he just received. That was strange. Eren was usually quite casual with him but reading this message, Eren didn’t seem himself at all.

 

Levi quickly sent a reply: **_Sure brat, are you ok? Something bothering you?_**

His friend replied within seconds: **_Thanks, I’ll be there in 15. I’ll explain when I get to yours._**

For some reason Levi felt nervous and cold sweat suddenly like before he sat down for his high school exams or for his work interview, he wasn’t entirely sure why. He began to tidy around his apartment, not that he needed to anyway; he scrubbed it clean daily and there was hardly any clutter that Levi needed clean up. His living space was beyond immaculate but it helps to calm himself down, focused on something else rather than the nagging thoughts running through his mind currently.

 

He had just finished wiping down the kitchen counter when he heard a loud knock on his door. Levi made his way over to it, took a deep breath and opened the door, revealing Eren; one of his closest friends since high school.

 

“What’s wrong? It’s nearly midnight and you have work tomorrow,” the shorter man stepped aside for his friend to enter his flat.

 

“Thanks for letting me come over, I need to talk about something with you, help me with something.” Eren scratched the back of his head and took a seat down in the leather sofa.

 

Levi let his eyes wander over the man, taking in Eren’s tanned skin against the navy flannel he wore which complimented his skin tone so well and hypnotic blue green eyes that seemed to drawn you in anytime you even just take a glance at them. His heart was pounding against his ribcage, looking for a way out to express the aching love he had for the man sitting on his sofa. He had known Eren since high school and even though Levi could always brush away his growing feelings for his friend for the past nine years, his mind tonight was gnawing at him to finally confess his feelings after keeping it hidden after all these years.

 

“Want something to drink? Got some beer in the fridge?” Levi managed to say, looking away just as Eren turned to look at him. He ignored the fact that he just fully checked out the brunet while he sat there, waiting to tell him whatever he came to say.

 

“No beer for me, I drove here. Just water thanks.”

 

Levi filled two glasses of water in silence, walked over to the sofa and placed the glasses on the coffee table before sitting down beside Eren leaving only a meter of space between them.

 

“You’re acting weird shit stain. Did Hanji try to experiment one of their new drugs on you? Did you and Jean break up?”

 

Eren chuckled resting the rim of the glass on his lips. He took a small sip and fiddled with the glass of water in his hands. “No Hanji didn’t do that but it is about Jean. We didn’t break up but it’s rather the opposite of what’s going to happen.”

 

“What… do you mean?” Levi’s throat was dry. His whole mind went blank; he didn’t even want to know what Eren had to say next. Levi already knew.

 

“I’ve been thinking about my future with Jean.” Eren started off slowly. “You were there for our whole relationship- you know we bicker and argue but at the end of the day, we both love each other very much. I mean sometimes I could _literally_ deck that horse face but it’s because we’re both stubborn asses.” The brunet grinned at Levi.

 

“Um, wow, I’m actually getting really nervous telling you this because you’re one of my closest friends and all-” Eren wiped his hands down his jeans. “I’m thinking of proposing to him. I want to spend the rest of my life with him, what’s your take on it?”

 

If was as if time has frozen. Levi wanted to believe that this was just a nightmare he was having and if he’d just pinch himself, he would wake up and all of this would have not been real.

 

But this was reality. _And it crushed him._ It was as if someone was squeezing the life out of him; breaking his ribs one by one, tearing the skin off his bones and crushing all his internal organs. He felt pain- _physical pain_ in his heart like a knife stabbing and twisting again and again.

 

“Earth to Levi? What do you think? Are you happy for me?”

 

Levi abruptly got up and took a few steps away from Eren, hands clenched at his side. He can’t. He can’t do this anymore. He never thought that Eren would finally settle down with Jean and it was fucking selfish of him but Levi couldn’t take it anymore. He had to tell him how he felt.

 

“Woah Levi calm down, you’ll wake up the neighbours with your excitement,” Eren joked and stood up. “Are you worried that I won’t choose you as my best man? Well no need to get your panties in a twist because you’re going to be! Of course, Connie, Armin, Marco, Reiner and all the guys will be the groomsmen-”

 

“No.” Silver eyes turned to look at blue-green ones.

 

“ _No?_ To being my best man or everyone being groomsmen?”

 

“Eren, I can’t fucking do this anymore. I’m saying no to all of this,” Levi gestured to his best friend. “Because I can’t bloody do it anymore. _I’m in love you with you.”_

 

The young man’s eyes widened. The glass in his hand fell and shattered over the rug, pieces of glass buried in the charcoal fur. Both men kept looking at each other, the mess that Eren had just made.

 

“You’re really not born to be a comedian,” The taller of the two laughed, hesitation in his voice. “You shouldn’t joke about stuff like that.”

 

“I’m not joking Eren.”

 

One look from Levi and Eren realised that he was telling the truth. A mix of anger and confusion because to collide and mix inside of him and he refrained from losing his temper.

 

“Since when?”

 

“I’m sorry Eren, I’m know that I’m being a selfish asshole but I had to tell you. It would kill me if I never told you and I know that it isn’t the right time to tell you but if I didn’t, I might never have gotten the chance. Fuck, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean-”

 

 _“Since when Levi!”_ Eren outburst of anger cut across Levi like a slap across the face.

 

Levi took a deep breath, heart pounding. He felt physically sick. “Ever since I first met you nine years ago. The moment I saw your eyes, I knew that I was gone for. You were a fucking piece of shit back then but I still saw past your pent-up anger and your distrust for other people. I wanted to tell you and I wanted something more but you were always in a relationship with other people and I didn’t want to ruin it for you-”

 

 _“Oh no don’t you fucking dare use that excuse on me. What about right now? I’m going to fucking propose to my boyfriend of five years and here you are, telling you that you’ve liked me all this time! No Levi Ackerman, don’t you fucking dare!”_ Eren voice echoed around the apartment, his eyes burning with anger.

“I can’t even explain to you how sorry I am. I-I couldn’t do it anymore; it was going to kill me.”

 

_“So you think that if you tell me now about your feelings now that I’m magically take back my idea of proposing to Jean? Fucking hell Levi, in your dreams. How can I do anything now, knowing that you’ve liked me all this time?”_

Levi was silent, his eyes staring at the wooden floors. He regretted it so much. After this, their friendship will never be the same again and it was all his fault. Goddamn his fucking feelings. Why did he even have to fall in love him out of all the guys in the world?

 

“You do understand that I can’t reciprocate your feelings, right? I apologise to you now if I ever made you feel like we could be together but…I always thought of you as a friend. Even if I did have feelings for you, I couldn’t do that to Jean, it wouldn’t be fair on him.”

 

The shorter man nodded and took a deep breath, trying to hide the hurt in this voice. “Of course. If only I could rewind time, back to when we were in high school, I would do everything differently.”

 

Eren took a few steps forward, his hand in front of him, so close that he could almost touch Levi’s arm as a way of comforting him.

 

Levi moved his arm out of Eren’s touch, and stared at his unrequited love, hot tears threatening to spill. His vision was already clouded; he could only see the shape of the man in front of him.

 

He couldn’t breathe. Every time he moved, pain travelled through every single nerve inside of him. He felt as if he was drowning in a storm. The feeling of sadness and guilt clawed at him, dragging him down.

 

_“If only I could rewind time…I would make sure I never became friends with you, so I won’t fall for you again.”_

**Author's Note:**

> If I'm being totally honest, I really don't know what I wrote. I wanted to write some angst and I decided just to do a one shot to procrastinate as I have an essay due next week but I really didn't want to write it. I'm not even sure if this one shot even made sense because Eren gets all angry and I have think they might have been OOC but I wanted to write something. I'm such trash as well, Eren doesn't even feel the same way (sorry guys). Sorry if there are any typos, I just wanted to get this out of my system and it's 0100 and I'm v tired.
> 
> I apologise if this is really shitty but enjoy?


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